As I write this, I’m sitting at my dining room table, looking out the sliders to my deck. A light snow is falling, and I’m watching the chickadees and finches and sparrows and titmice make forays to the feeder I’ve put out for them. The blue jays have already scooped up all the peanuts I put out on the deck earlier, and a squirrel has already gone through its gymnastics to access the suet feeder for a morning snack. All is right with the world. At least from the birds’ and squirrels’ perspective. At this moment.
But if the birds were to think back to the scene that unfolded yesterday morning out at the bird feeder on my front porch, they might not have considered their world so cheery. That’s because yesterday morning a juvenile red-tailed hawk stopped by. It began visiting us last week. The first time I glimpsed it, it was perched on my porch railing, about three feet away from me. We were separated only by my kitchen window. What a gorgeous bird! And a real treat to see it up close. It even looked in my direction at one point. It returned the next two days. I continued to delight in its presence, grateful for such a close-up view of this raptor.
Not surprisingly, the birds didn’t share my enthusiasm: One day a few years ago, when we had a particularly harsh winter, I saw a hawk swoop down onto my back deck and pick off a junco. The other birds stayed away from the blood-stained snowy deck for the rest of the day. Now, too, when the hawk shows up, the songbirds clear out. So do the chipmunks that gather the seeds that the birds drop.
Yesterday, the hawk chose to perch on a bush at the corner of my front porch. Had it spied the chipmunk that had run off the porch a bit earlier? Or was it just hanging out and waiting, having learned that breakfast was to be had in this area? Who knows. I don’t even know whether it’s ever caught anything out there. I haven’t witnessed the murder of any of the little critters I adore, but I’m not so naïve as to think that if I don’t see it, it’s not happening.
And what about the birds? What awareness do they have of the possibility of danger when danger is not yet obviously present? They must have some awareness of that sort – that must be what urges the chickadee to fly off to the cover of a pine tree with each little seed it plucks from the feeder, instead of lazily munching on it right out in the open. But here’s the question that comes to mind for me: Does knowing that danger is possible prevent that chickadee from enjoying the seeds it eats? Or dilute the squirrel’s enjoyment of the suet? (I’m convinced that it wouldn’t show the same enthusiasm for a piece of bread, so I’m going to conclude that when it chows down on suet, it’s experiencing whatever we call “joy” in non-human creatures.)
I’m going to go out on a limb and say that the chickadee and the squirrel just experience that joy whenever and wherever it shows up: in a sunflower seed here, a suet feeder there. I think that even though part of their brain is scanning for danger, another part is also scanning for joy. And when they encounter it – in the form of a millet seed or a mouthful of suet – they totally go for the gusto and squeeze every possible bit of joy out of it that they can. They say “Yes!” – not only to the life-sustaining nourishment of the food, but also to the joy that comes with eating it, even though they know on some level that a hawk might be circling above them.
It seems to me that we humans operate differently than my friends on the deck. Because we have these big, reasoning brains, we get far more distracted than they do by thinking about past or possible dangers. If I were a junco – but with my human consciousness – and if I’d seen a red-tailed hawk devour a flock-mate before my eyes, I would never, ever, EVER want to visit that birdfeeder again. But I imagine that if I did visit it again, because, well, I needed to eat, my mind would be so overwhelmed by fear that I’d be unable to enjoy my meal at all. The terror of the memory of the hawk would crowd out the joy.
It seems to me that this crowding-out-of-joy happens so often to us humans. We get preoccupied with whatever unpleasant situations are playing out in our lives or in the world (i.e., hawks, from the perspective of a bird or a chipmunk), and, before we realize it, we’ve eaten an entire chocolate pecan turtle without having properly soaked in the caramel-chocolate-pecan yumminess. In other words, we’ve just squandered an opportunity to invite joy in.
So, what I’ve been thinking about lately is that, because we are such thinking-oriented creatures, we humans need to make a conscious effort to bring joy into our lives. More chocolate pecan turtles, fewer “hawks”. I’ll admit that it’s often not easy to choose to focus on what’s joyful, instead of on what’s upsetting. I know this from my own experience: I was writing about myself earlier when I mentioned the pecan turtle. And yet, I find that when I consciously shift my thoughts away from a potential or past or present difficulty, and toward doing or thinking about something pleasant, I can experience so much joy!
Take watching the birds and squirrels on my deck. When I gaze out at that scene in a frame of mind that is clouded by this or that situation that’s weighing me down, I may see the birds, but I don’t really see them. My mind is preoccupied with what’s bothering me. But when I can set all of that aside and really look, here’s what I might see: a junco doing its hilarious two-footed hop on the deck, or a chickadee tapping a sunflower seed on the branch of a nearby tree. That’s when I find myself smiling, grateful that these tiny birds’ antics have just filled me with so much joy. And marveling that all it took was a conscious decision on my part to mentally invite joy into my life for a visit.
So, I as we approach the end of this crazy year, I want to take the opportunity to wish you many, many moments of joy. May you have the wish to focus your attention on what will throw the door of your heart and mind wide open to joy. And may you have the courage and perseverance to make this wish a reality, a new habit that will guide and infuse your life as you enter 2021. I’d like to offer a little mantra, too. This helps me stay focused on inviting joy in, instead of on dwelling on what bothers me: Fewer “hawks”, more turtles.
Much love to you all.
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And to give you a bit of practice at inviting joy into your life, here’s a guided meditation for you. (The transcript follows the recording.)
Let’s start by finding a way to sit that will be comfortable for about ten minutes. Or, you can lie down, if you prefer. Close your eyes, if that feels good to you. Otherwise, just lower your gaze so that you won’t be distracted by your surroundings.
Let’s take in one nice deep breath, and then let it out, slowly.
Then do that two more times, at your own pace.
We’re here in our virtual Club Joy, taking a break from everything in the outside world of our life. And I think we’d all say that there’s some area of that life that we’d like to be experiencing more joy in. So that’s what we’re going to do today- invite Joy into one part of our life.
If you were here with us last week, or if you listened to the recording of the guided meditation from last week, then you’ve already come up with an image of a door for yourself, a door that opens up to Joy. If you already have an image of that door, imagine it before you now. If you haven’t yet created a door that opens up to Joy, for now, just imagine that you’re standing in front of a door. It can be whatever kind of door you want. And on that door is a sign that says, “Joy”. This sign is there to show you that Joy is right on the other side of the door, and that whenever you open that door, you are opening up to experience Joy.
So now, take a moment to imagine your door. This is your personal door to Joy.
Now imagine that you’re holding a different sign in your hands. This sign is blank. But in a few moments you’re going to decorate it or write something on this sign, so that it will indicate the part of your life that you’d like to invite Joy into. Then you’ll be hanging that sign on the outside of your door to Joy. That way Joy will know exactly which part of your life it can enter once you open the door.
In your mind now, hold this blank sign out in front of you. What color would you like the sign itself to be? Go ahead and imagine making it that color.
Now let’s go ahead and start the process of choosing which part of your life will be represented on this sign. You can be certain that whichever part of your life would like an infusion of Joy has been waiting for this moment since we began our meditation. Maybe it’s already standing in front of you, one arm raised in excitement, calling out, “Pick me! Pick me!” If that’s the case, then you already know what will go onto your sign.
But if no particular part of your life has occurred to you yet to focus on, that’s okay. It’s just being a little shy. To encourage it to make itself known to you, start by imagining once again that you’re holding that blank sign out in front of you. And allow a message to appear there from whichever part of your life would like to have a visit from Joy. It may appear as a word on the sign, or as a word or phrase in your mind. Or as an image of some part of your life or person. Or you may simply know without seeing or hearing anything. Take a minute or two now to gaze at your sign and to allow yourself to become aware of which part of your life this is, in as much detail as possible.
Now that you have a sense of which area of your life is calling out to have Joy come for a visit, take a moment to express that on your sign in some way – in words, or in an image. So that Joy will see it and understand where to it’ll be heading once you open the door.
Okay. Now it’s time to hang this inviting sign on the outside of your door to Joy. Go ahead and imagine doing that right now. And take time to look at your sign and admire it, once it’s hanging on the door.
Great. Now you have a door that clearly tells Joy which area of your life it will enter when it comes through this door that you’ve created and labelled. So, now it’s time to actually invite Joy to come through the door and into this part of your life. We need to do this consciously, because Joy doesn’t want to just barge in, uninvited. Think of it this way: It’s like having a little sign with your name on it next to your front door, so that a visitor who comes to your house will know who they’ll find on the other side of the door. But that sign isn’t an invitation to come in. It’s just there to let visitors know they’ve come to the right place. They still need to wait on the doorstep until you open the door and say, “Come on in!” It’s the same with Joy. It sees your sign – right at this very moment, in fact! – and knows which part of your life is behind that door. But it’s waiting for your invitation to enter that space.
Before you go ahead and open the door to Joy, though, let’s take a moment to decide how you want to invite Joy in. Is there a certain phrase you’d like to use? A gesture? A sound? A song? A dance? What feels right to you at this moment as a way to invite Joy to enter your life? Take a moment to consider your invitation.
Now, go ahead. Open your door and offer your special invitation to Joy. Invite it to enter and join you in the part of your life you’ve chosen.
Imagine now that Joy really is stepping into this space where you’re standing now, and that this space represents the part of your life you chose to invite Joy to enter. Maybe you’ll see Joy, or hear it, or feel it, or simply sense it. But know that it is coming in. After all, you gave it a lovely invitation, and Joy is a very enthusiastic visitor! Take a couple of minutes now, just to rest in the awareness that Joy is now present in the part of your life that you indicated on your sign. Allow yourself to receive this awareness in whatever way it arrives. And I’ll let you know when we’re finished with this part of the meditation.
Wonderful. No matter what you experienced in this last part of our meditation, I invite you to inwardly give thanks to Joy for visiting. Even if it seems to you that you didn’t experience anything at all, know that Joy has entered into that part of your life that invited it to visit. In fact, it’s still there. It intends to stay for a good, long while. And if you ever have a moment when you doubt that it’s still there, go ahead and open the door once again. Consciously invite Joy in again. You can even ask Joy to give you some kind of sign that it’s really there.
You can also feel free to create a new sign for your door, if you want to invite Joy into another part of your life. And don’t think you have to take down the first sign when you do that. You can fill up the outside of your door to Joy with invitations. That’s because Joy can be present in more than one part of your life at once. There’s plenty of Joy to go around.
So, I hope you’ll enjoy your visits with Joy, and I wish for Joy to be present in every nook and cranny of your life.
Now we’re going to start gently and gradually returning our attention to where we’re gathered together.
As you’re ready, I invite you to open your eyes.
Sue Downing 